www.billcphd.com – Part 1 of 4 of a PBS Special featuring psychologist Dr. Bill Crawford on a new approach to dealing with difficult people and/or conflict resolution
Dealing with Difficult People Versus Them Dealing with You!
May 22, 2010 By 28 Comments
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I manage a team of international and local staff in a developing country. Some of the latter complain that while performing the same tasks as the former they are paid much less due to their “local” status. It is not possible to adapt salary grid. How can I solve this conflict?
I don’t know if he is or not but I have this problem…someone will get me worked up inside and i don’t show it but I just become quiet and try to remove myself from the area. why is this….its so hard to talk at those times too.
@hustlegrl22 good luck….
That’s the thing. My loved one seems to have a better “grip” on the situation than I do. I want to be strong for him and get over it. I’m tired of giving so much energy to this person who had inflicted a lot of pain. He told me to day that one day she will reap what she sew and that it is important to do the right thing. I just want to stop feeling so negative and having hate in my heart.
It is certainly harder to deal with situations such as these – And – Just to be sure I know what you are asking . . . Are you wanting help in not getting “worked up” or are you asking how to help your loved one?
Thanks, Bill
I am able to let things go when dealing with difficult and am able to coexist peacefully. The problem with me is when a friend or loved one has to deal with a difficult person. That makes me get worked up. How do I deal when someone has hurt someone else that I love?
I couldn’t agree more. In fact, in my new book “Life from the Top of the Mind” I talk about how “difficult” behavior comes from the lower 20% of the brain that is engaged by fear. Thanks for writing:-) Bill Crawford, Ph.D.
It has been my experience, that most difficult people suffer from deeply rooted inferiority complexes and insecurities. Most people who truly love themselves, are happy and content, and have no desire to be rude and insensitive to others!
This video is very helpful. I lost a job, almost two because I snapped at a guy who deserved to be snapped at. I don’t have a temper, but on the other side I wasn’t grown up to take people’s unadulterated shit. It ended up him with a busted up face and me getting fired at a very high paying job.
Great to hear that this was helpful and the fact that you can understand the value of not arguing about petty issues should serve you well in all your future relationships. Congratulations!
Bill
This helped, my mom was like I gave you a cookie and I said no I didn’t eat it. She said yes you did and I said no I didn’t! It just kept going on like a cycle. I told her it’s petty stuff and she clamed down finally. Also people who do rude comments on my vids I just block them simple as that.
Sorry, this is not my experience. I never lost my temper, became defensive, or got angry with the bully in my office. I acquiesced and agreed, and killed her with kindness, and she became even MORE angry, badmouthing me absurdly. Therefore I made sure that as many people as far up the ladder as I could witnessed her abusive behavior, and I must say that she accommodated me beautifully by behaving like a spoiled, conceited brat. Some people are truly wicked, immature, and incompetent.
Thanks! This vid really help ALOT! I won’t argue difficult people on youtube anymore. Let them say all they want. No one can help them but themselves.
I thought the lesson of the fist was strike first, strike hard, no mercy, sir.
Funny and informative, he is a very good speaker
Why?
I dont like the “sense of humor” many american speakers have, they should say a couple of hilarius comments, and thats it.
great video! i like it!!
Really great to land on this. Info I needed and I’m glad to share. Thanks for making the world a better place.
Steve
Dr. Crawford is my latest personal hero… great vid!
Interesting, but I’m not quite sure yet how to deal with the difficult types I MOST meet, and those are women in general, who are so disorganized they allow themselves about 2 minutes to get every single duty done and then become totally outraged when the process takes three to five minutes blaming everyone else around them for their bad planning time.
This is really good stuff. Well done lecture providing information about better interpersonal relationships.
great video…real good help…
My goodness, this is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. People like me often ignore clear, common sense stuff because we’re so clouded by immediate emotions and trapped in the cycle of conflict. You just knocked some sense in to me. Thank you. I needed to hear this.
awesome vid!
Keep posting stuff like this i really like it